The Loss of a friend sets me thinking again

Today I saw in the obituary section a picture of a friend, more an acquaintence of mine during our University years at the NTI. Noel was a year older than us and he studied in the Electrical Engineering School. We met occasionally at the canteens and he hung out with another clique whereas I was never really into any cliques choosing to have individual groups of friends at different occasions. He had passed away on 5th November, at the age of 56. 

He was the MD of a telecommunications company and I had met him some 3 years ago with a mutual friend (Fat Yap) at the Serangoon Gardens and we chatted over coffee about how time flew and fortunes of people who we knew in common. 

He never married and left behind parents, and siblings. I was stunned for a while, then reflective about what I am doing in this world. 

The point which was reminded again clearly to me was that life is finite, it can be short, or long, but is it meaningful to ME ? Set clear priorities and some goals and chase after them, make friends, get good friends, find a partner fall in love, start a family (or not), work, have a long and meaningful (hopefully it pays well) career, start a business, these are all activities which are expected by our other halves, our children, our parents, our colleagues, bosses and people around us. 

Stop and think for a minute. 

Whats it all about ?  Life. 

Take the Purpose Driven Path, set forth and go after whatever you set out to be. There will be shitty times, so called friends will betray you, you may lose you partner, ill health will threaten to throw the whole thing out and reset your path, death of loved ones and setbacks, financial, health, (mental and physical),economic challenges will all come several at the same time.

At the end of it all, I must be satisfied that I lived it the way I ought to have lived it, with a sense of purpose, which indeed give some benefit and uplift to the people that mean the most to me, my family and my close friends.  Seeing them make and achieve something of their lives will be the ultimate satisfaction.

Monetary gratification and wealth generation will never appease me totally. So just make enough to say, OK, thats it. Easier said than done, so make sure I save and spend less than I earn.

Then I can say, thats it.  I have Seized the Day.  Its the end of my journey. 


    

Reunion of the 1978 'O' Levels St Andrew's batch

Back Row L - R : Paul Lim, Gurdeep Singh,Glynn Sim, Yours Truly,Paul Ezekiel,Pang Seng Meng,Chew Ping Nan, Kanna,Samuel Abeysekera,Syn Pok Choon,Andrew Lee, A. Surendran.

Front Row : Chew Loo Kwong,Freddy Choy,Thulasaidas,Peter Ooi, Peter Tan, Jeff Kwan,Albert Hong, Kenneth Fong Kai Yew. 

September 23rd 2017, this was the day we celebrated in school and we had a total of 20 'boys' (16 year olds plus 39) in school. 16 was the year we took our 'O' or GCE Ordinary Levels Examinations. We all turn 55 by this year end. So the time for reflection is there for all of us ;  some of us are about to be grandfathers, Abraham Matthew got married this year (better now than never !) and we all are finding the reconnecting of our friends from our youth so pure and without any expectations or agendas set forth except that we want to 'carry on where we left off'. Some of my old friends I have not met since 16 years of age, so that was like 39 years ago ! 

The night before, we had a bash at Foster's Steak House at Holland Village and we had a total of 53 old boys turning up. The master of ceremonies, Apparoo Surendran did a great job, and I am honored to be part of that organizing team comprising Paul Ezekiel, Andrew Lee, Chew Ping Nan, Surendran and myself. 


Time is running fast away, and we are aware of our physical frailties and diminishing health. Its two thirds, or three quarters and unknown to us, maybe some of us are almost at the end of our journey. 

We have strived for our bosses, our families, our friends and associates, but most importantly, we need to take care of ourselves. 

I am truly happy to make 49 plus old friends again ; lets not take another 39 years to meet up guys !!! 

Seize the Day !!!!! 

Beautiful Canberra, Australian Capital Territory

Houses of Parliament 

This was a recent trip I took to visit the Houses of Parliament in Canberra, Australian Capital Territories. The Australian Government convenes there every month, and now with the row over the dual citizenship of elected members of Parliament, things are going to look quite busy in the next few months. 

Canberra has a registered population of about 350,000. It has a broad expanse of land, and the centre of the city is the Capital Hill where the Parliament House sits. During our trip there for a couple of days, we took the flight from Singapore to Sydney (7 hours) and then a connecting domestic flight from Sydney to Canberra by propeller plane lasting about 1 hour.

From the airport, we rented a car to drive and we were in the city within half an hour upon arrival and car takeaway. The city centre (correct me if I am wrong) is around the Manuka District (that of the Manuka Honey fame) and the Manuka Circle houses some 30 - 40 shops and supermarket. Its very pleasant during the time we were there and we had a sumptuous breakfast (I believe I had the eggs benedict) when we were there.

Houses along Franklin Street

The avenues are tree lined and during the short visit, I observed the population is mainly white Australian with a sprinkling of Asians and other aboriginal peoples. The houses along Franklin Avenue were modern in design and the restaurants along Manuka Circle were serving multi national food fare. 

David standing along Franklin Street 

During the visit to Parliament House, I had a chance to view all the portraits of the past Prime Ministers and had a good look at the definitions and roles of the elected Members of Parliament as well as definitions of the roles of mayors and ministers of the Federal Government. Following the Westminister model, all MPs must be elected every 4 - 5 years with the party with the most popular mandate with a simple majority forming the Government. In the event of no party winning the popular vote, then a coalition government can be formed with 2 or even 3 parties coming together to secure the government.

Breakfast along Manuka Circle in lovely autumn weather 

The current government I believe is the Labour Party headed by HE Mr. Malcolm Turnbull.Australia is part of the Commwealth group of countries (countries which were colonies of the British Empire until the 2nd world war for most of them). I will have ample opportunity to visit this lovely city again soon and will want to explore more of the outskirts and living opportunities in this sprawled out capital city.

Shit Happens in Life ; Deal with It ; Shovel it out and Press On

A funny joke  WEE, sleekit, cow’rin, tim’rous beastie,
O, what a panic’s in thy breastie!
Thou need na start awa sae hasty,
Wi’ bickering brattle!
I wad be laith to rin an’ chase thee,	5
Wi’ murd’ring pattle!
I’m truly sorry man’s dominion,
Has broken nature’s social union,
An’ justifies that ill opinion,
Which makes thee startle	10
At me, thy poor, earth-born companion,
An’ fellow-mortal!
I doubt na, whiles, but thou may thieve;
What then? poor beastie, thou maun live!
A daimen icker in a thrave	15
’S a sma’ request;
I’ll get a blessin wi’ the lave,
An’ never miss’t!
Thy wee bit housie, too, in ruin!
It’s silly wa’s the win’s are strewin!	20
An’ naething, now, to big a new ane,
O’ foggage green!
An’ bleak December’s winds ensuin,
Baith snell an’ keen!
Thou saw the fields laid bare an’ waste,	25
An’ weary winter comin fast,
An’ cozie here, beneath the blast,
Thou thought to dwell—
Till crash! the cruel coulter past
Out thro’ thy cell.	30
That wee bit heap o’ leaves an’ stibble,
Has cost thee mony a weary nibble!
Now thou’s turn’d out, for a’ thy trouble,
But house or hald,
To thole the winter’s sleety dribble,	35
An’ cranreuch cauld!
But, Mousie, thou art no thy lane,
In proving foresight may be vain;
The best-laid schemes o’ mice an’ men
Gang aft agley,	40
An’lea’e us nought but grief an’ pain,
For promis’d joy!
Still thou art blest, compar’d wi’ me
The present only toucheth thee:
But, Och! I backward cast my e’e.	45
On prospects drear!
An’ forward, tho’ I canna see,
I guess an’ fear!
Robert Burns The poet Robert Burns accidently tore through a little mouse's abode in the field so aghast was he that he wrote an entire poem to expess his disappointment and regret (I personally would have just let the fella live and move on), so the poetic and talented would write a sonnet just for easing his guilt and soul and hence the phrase  'the best laid plans of mice and men often go astray'. How often do we see our and our friends hopes and dreams dashed by family squabbles, friends or colleagues backstabbing, business failures, bankruptcies, serious sickness, weather disruptions and financial disasters ?  It is life's unpredictability.  Life is determined by first setting our goals and then when these unexpected things happen (I call them shit), the situation takes control and we are thrust into the vortex of crisis management and time, or health lost.  At the end of the day, we are shaped by how we respond to such crises and whether we can rise up from the ashes of bitter and stinging defeat, health crises, family or interrelationship issues and press on.  It is never about how others view you, that is beyond your control, so do not bother about the perceptions by others about you, that can and will change once they do understand or bother to understand the fine nuances of the situation ; if they are remote and pass comments, well it doesn't matter, as they mean nothing to the sphere or environment in which you are existing. Proving to yourself that you made a difference to this world, your small sphere of influence, your family, your closest friends, your business partners and associates, and finally your acquaintences or work and charity related societys.  There are many million dollar pain in the ass people who flaunt their supposed power and wealth. Don't go near them, it is not in your interest to upstage them. They are ever present and visible, let them be.  Life has a way of evening out things at the end of the day. Just take care of the little mouse who is trying to eke an existence in your field (parable speak).

After the 2 - 1 loss at Queens Park Rangers, a 2 - 0 away win at Carrow Road ;

The Wolves team have taken the bitter pill of the loss at QPR where they let in a soft goal and conceded another against the run of play by playing at their best at Norwich City on Tuesday and ekeing a fine 2 - 0 win away.

This has reinforced their lead at the top of the Championship and have a home match against Fulham this Friday 3rd November.

The team is in fine spirits, the Manager is a visionary and results oriented person and the fans are ecstatic.

Lets keep up the fine form for the rest of the season !  

This is what I wrote in 2010 ; a repost ; how times(and money from a rich Chinese conglomerate) and fortunes have changed for the Wolves !

W is for 'Wolves' and in Old Gold Too ! 

         This is the $ 64 million question I think I need to answer. My formative teenage years were in the 1970s and the top entertainment during those times was the colour TV (introduced during the 1974 World Cup Final between Germany and Holland). Oh how, it changed people's lives forever. We could actually see in S.E.Asia what was going on 'live' as it happened halfway around the world. There was no Internet, no Facebook,Twitter, no PCs (first introduced in the early 80s), no mobile phones, no IPhones etc. It was really like living in the Stone Age !

        Every week, Singapore would get the English Premier league shown on Channel 5 maybe delayed telecast (2 - 3 weeks later) IN COLOUR. And the games then were played in a very passionate and rough and tumble manner, and of course being part of the Commonwealth, English football took a firm hold in the hearts and minds of many ordinary Singaporeans and Malaysians. The games were less skillful than those today and we had no Serie A, La Liga, Bundesliga etc. to watch.

        So, in those days, one of the more unique sounding teams was Wolverhampton Wanderers, or Wolves for short and I kind of fancied myself like their chief striker John Richards, who played once or twice for the English national team. I had no idea where they were or if they were even champions. But I faithfully bought the SHOOT ! magazine every week after school (it was available at the neighbourhood shop for about S$ 1 a copy, a princely sum then) and followed their fortunes. I was kind of naive, not wanting to follow a big name team like Liverpool, Arsenal, Manchester United etc. but the uniqueness of supporting an obscure West Midlands team had its appeal. So I stuck with them, even though their glory days of winning the league twice in the 1950s to early 60s were long gone, even before I was born.

       Since I followed them (say around 1976), they have only won the League Cup TWICE, once in 1974 (against Manchester City) and once more  in 1980 against Nottingham Forest. AND THAT'S IT ! 

      Andy Gray headed in a solitary goal against Nottingham Forest and it was 1-0. That's the  2 major silverware they have won in the last 30 years. YES VERY PATHETHIC. They have been relegated several times since the 1980s and their last stay in the lower regions has been almost 15 years. I forgot them altogether, although I visited the stadium Molineux in 1987 (23 years ago) with some University friends. So I am not a true blue die hard supporter. I am just a FAIR WEATHERED SUPPORTER - ALTHOUGH AFTER THIS SEASON THAT MAY CHANGE FOREVER ! 

    Call me a romantic, but the PLUS POINT of supporting a no-hope team is that :

     Whenever they win a game against any other Premier league team, its like WINNING THE CUP FINAL .No one expects them to win anything, let alone stay in the top flight of the Premier League, so their being in the top 20 for  2 years (2008 till now) is already a cause for celebration.

     They invest a miniscule amount of money on players, have no brand name stars, and have been using their stadium for 30 years with little upgrade. Money is tight. I have been to the town of Wolverhampton and it is woefully sad and run down many factories have closed shop decades ago (it is an industrial town) and the only revenue is from their university and polytechnics which offer decent degrees and diplomas in Engineering.

     So when they win a match I celebrate like they have WON THE CUP FINAL  !

      Compare that to someone who supports Arsenal, Liverpool,Man U or Chelsea,their supporters expect them to WIN A TROPHY EACH YEAR. When the do, its EXPECTED. When they don't its a massive DISAPPOINTMENT. So the supporters are JADED, winning is like so boring. So when a team like Liverpool loses a match to Wolves, its a MAJOR DISASTER.  So their emotions are OK we won (this week), BOO we lost to XXX.

       Life must be quite torturous for those fans, the expectations are always rising each season.

      My approach with Wolves is this ; They lost last week (OK) ; This week they won (YEAH, OLE,OLE, OLE !!! )

     So I am a FOREVER OPTIMIST.

      So on 30th Dec 2010,  Liverpool  0    Wolves 1.

      Its TIME TO PARTY !  OLE ! OLE ! OLE !

Well done you Wolves ; you left Etihad stadium with your head held high ; So proud of this performance.

The championship leaders took on the Premier league leaders AWAY on Tuesday 24th October and the score was 0 - 0 at the end of extra time after 120 minutes of regulation play. 

Santos played 9 alternate players like Helda Costa, N'Bakare, Bright, Price, Will Norris (goalkeeper who in my mind was the Man of the Match), Vinegre, Marshall. Their regular strike force of Jota, Bonatini, and Cavalero did not start the match.

Wolves had 3 1 on 1 with the goalkeeper Bravo who is so aptly named, a Chilean International and the coach Guardiola only blamed Wolves defensive stance and the Mitre ball, which in my opinion was an absolute joke, as he then did not have to justify why his team of 300 odd million pounds worth of skill couldn't beat a 30 odd million pound team put together by brilliant Nunos in just 6 months. Guardiola is a master tactician but a sore 'loser' in this instance. 

In the end it came down to penalties, and while City netted all 4 of their tries, Wolves only got the solitary one from Bonatini. 

The ball is kicked, dribbled and headed by both sides, so where can there be any criticism of a FIFA sanctioned 'tool'.  A lousy workman blames his 'tools' so Guardiola just gave me a lousy impression, not much of a sport.