What is Success ? Are you a Success in Life (Reprinted from my Blog in 2020)

This endearing picture above shows a little boy sitting on the beach, with his hands clenched on a fistful of sand and staring determinedly at the photo-taker. He has a look of bliss on his face, which seems to say "Hey, I am on my way !".  

Well, it is only partly true, in my book. Having been running a business as well as raising a family, for more than 30 years, we should all look at ourselves and ask point blank, Is my life a success ? 

I recall playing the board game called "Careers" or "The Game of Life" whereby the playing board represents Life and one goes out to achieve a total of 60 units of either :

a) Fame (becoming a celebrity) 

b) Money (become a billionaire) 

c) Love  (Hard to define this person, but I guess someone who is in Love and has Love). 

If only life were that simple.  

Lets dive in and look at each of these sought after sometimes intangible 'commodities' in deep analysis.   

Money 

Money, For almost everyone on this planet, with the exception for a few lucky souls like royal families, and scions of billionaires, is very important to everybody. There are many people who have worked and slogged and made a pile and find that at the end of life, a certain emptiness. A lack of creating a footprint for others to follow. So, while having enough money is important, the endless pursuit of wealth for the sake of having more wealth, will leave one devoid of empathy, or concern for one's fellow man. 

I find these never ending pursuits of the so called 5 Cs quite disturbing in our rich and plentiful Singapore. For those who are not familiar, the 5 "C"s young people strive to achieve without a thought for anything else : a) Condo b) Car c) Country Club d) Career e) Cash. And only those who have accumulated enough of the Moolah can then afford to buy these. In the bible this is called Mammon or Material Things.

At the end of the day, there are multitudes of marketing and sales people peddling everything from the latest smartwatch, to getting smarter by using ChatGPT to the exclusive Condos, and landed properties in the gentrified estates next to the city.  

Young and not so young people strive to drive the latest sports car or status car offerings, while the women carry the latest designer handbags and sport the 3 karat diamond rings. They may offer satisfaction, but it is only temporary, 

There will then be the yearning for something bigger or better or flashier. or they wake up one day and say "to hell with it all".

It is like hunger pangs which once fulfilled satisfies for a while before the yearning to make more comes along.  So making money for the sake of money is not Success. 

Fame 

Fame Some people want to be seen with the stars and crave attention. See all the famous Hollywood, Bollywood, JPop, KPop and HK stars. They make alot of money, have all the attention BUT have no private life. They have major crises, take drugs, gamble, have affairs and are afflicted with all or even worse problems than us 'nobodies'. As recently as last year 2 KPop idols, Sulli and Goo Hara committed suicide due to loneliness and depression as a result of leading the so-called 'perfect princess' lives which turned out to be lies. So sad. 

Fame as an Ends is also not Success. 

Love 

Love Ah, Love is always the one pure emotion. Yes, one can have alot of Love, but can we get by with giving Love to our loved ones and live on fresh air, love and music ? Dream on Love is an emotion, so we all have the capacity to give and receive Love. So Love by itself is not Success. Having and Giving Love probably is one facet to leading a successful life though. 

So What Does A Person Do to achieve Success ?

 

So what does one do to achieve Success ?? First lets try to define Success. In my humble opinion, first look critically at your own life. Identify what you want to change for yourself. It may be trying to improve your standard of living, your car or apartment, or even taking more holidays. Once you have identified and managed to achieve them, STOP. Look around you, there are many many more millions of people worse off than you. Why go on and on the merry-go-round of endless upgrading form HDB flat, to Condominium to House, to MASSIVE DEBT ? GAINING OF MATERIAL THINGS IN LIFE IS NOT SUCCESS, ITS MEANINGLESS !! 

SUCCESS IN LIFE IS TAKING THE PURPOSEFUL JOURNEY. IT HAS NO END POINT.

Living a purposeful life helping one's family, community, friends or religion without a thought for one's situation is a Success story in itself. But before one can start doing that, he must be financially secure and have relevant income streams so that Money and Family stability are not compromised. Here is where, everyone deviates or does not agree upon. What is Financial Stability ?? $10,000 ? $100,000 ? $ 1 Million ? $ 10 Million ? 

What's the Magic Number ?? That magic number depends on one's personal sense of comfort. 

Hypothetical Example

Take Mr. A : " I am 45, I have a flat, my kids have finished school and I take public transport to work. Wife is a good cook and we dine out at restaurants once a month. I have saved $ 100,000 for my next 5 years and can start to do some community work or help out in my Church outreach. Its time I gave back after having taken from others all these years. " Very noble. I salute these people. 

These are the true Success stories in this dog-eat-dog world. So, in the end, the church, temple and mosque helpers will say, "Doesn't matter. God will provide" However, in many circumstances, but there are many hard luck stories who have fallen by the wayside in the pursuit of the wrong goals and have relentlessly used or adopted these mannerisms in their daily life. 

I list them down, these are the 7 Deadly Sins. 

1. Lust 

2. Greed 

3. Sloth (Laziness) 

4. Anger 

5. Gluttony 

6. Hatred 

7. Envy 

I would define Success as this : Living one's own sphere of life, as being able to do what he / she wants, growing in character, and ultimately in helping others without much thought of one's well being. To get to that point, one needs to take stock of one's own life and be SATISFIED with whatever he already has, and not be green with envy that the neighbour has gotten a new and bigger car than him, or is going for holidays every 3 months while he has to slog just to pay the bills. To achieve success, one has to have these traits or acquire these attitudes : 

a) Dogged Determination to reach the goal   > 40% 

b) Resilience in bad times .                             >30% 

c) Vision to dream where he wants to be        > 30% 

Seize the Day my friends. Life is there for Living. Don't Moan or worse Bad Mouth others. Don't be a whiner and whinger and drop out at the first sign of difficulty. 

Be a Winner and Doer. Possess Grit, Resilience and Positive Mental attitude come what may.

Set your goals, however small, and while on your achieve them and help the less able.

There is no time like to present to start. 

That is Success.

Siamese Boat Noodles Thong Smith - Central Mall

 Tucked inside the Food Street at Central Mall is the Thong Smith Boat Noodles. So called because I guess in the old days, the vendors made the noodles at home, and put it in a pot with a charcoal portable stove underneath and paddled to the 'tongkangs' or boats which plied the Chao Phrya River. It was a means to feed all the workers and steveadores who had to take the sacks of rice from the godowns to the ships moored outside Bangkok port and transport the foreign supplies from the ships moored out at sea and into the godowns.

Thong Smith Boat Noodles 

This is my educated guess as to why it is called Boat Noodles. Now, it has gone all fancy and is located in many places including high end shopping complexes such as Central Mall. The branch on the 3rd floor is ALWAYS crowded so when we went on a Friday afternoon at 3pm, there were like 5 to 6 people in front of us. This place is a magnet for tourists so there will be many Chinese and S.E. Asians their to fill their hungry tummies.

The beef noodles I had was tender, but the flavourings were sweet and spicy and the taste was overpowering.  The noodles were chewy enough and there were some small chopped spring onions and the lemongrass flavour was also in the dish.

Good but not great. 

Must Try when in Bangkok

1. Thai Durians - since the Chinese demand this year is tepid, there are plentiful Thai durians without much pungent aroma, it tastes (to the Westerners) like textured ice cream and very flavourful. It is called the King of Fruits.

2. Crab Fried Rice 

They are practically everywhere - the Thai simple restaurants which serve up this dish are omnipresent in every shopping centre. The crab meat (mud) and taste is tremendous. Squeeze a bit of lemon and you got one top tasting fried rice. Better than all the Chinese seafood fried which is far too oily for me.

3. Deep Fried Sea Bass

Chaloern Restaurant - this chain is everywhere in Bangkok. Again, one of the signature Thai dishes when you are in Thailand. Must Try.

4. Tom Yam Kung (soup)

Any basic restaurant worth its name must do a great Tom Yam Soup. They have 2 versions, the clear (very misleading but very spicy) or the chilli infused one. Try it at your peril. I love it when I am sweating profusely and eating the seafood with small button mushrooms with gusto.     

Central Mall seen from the SkyBridge 

If you are not familiar with Bangkok, there are numerous hotels from 1 star to 5 star and the prices are very decent. I stayed for work recently at a 2 star hotel near Phya Thai BTS station and it cost me all of THB 1100 or USD 30. It was clean, within walking distance from the BTS Phya Thai station and came with free wi fi. The price ranges for hotels in Bangkok start from THB 900 (1 to 2 star) to  more than THB 10,000 (5 star by the river). 

Boat Noodles 

 This bowl costs approximately THB 300 or USD 10. 

For my family trip, we booked the Novotel Siam Square, which is right in the middle of all the shopping, massage and eating scenes. Novotel is located within walking distance from the Siam BTS station and Siam Square is right next to it. Siam Square is reminiscent of a small suburb of Tokyo with many small clothing outlet stores selling plentiful cheap T shirts, sneakers, bags, bracelets and all manner of trinkets for young people.

The Thai food is generally sweet, and there is a heavy dose of fish sauce thrown into all salads (mango or otherwise). The mango sticky rice is also very sweet, comprising of liquid sugar  infused mango with sticky glutinous rice. You can buy this in many shopping centre food courts and is a signature dessert for Thailand. 

If you travel light, take the VTS Skytrain, it goes from Suvanabhum to Phya Thai station in the heart of Bangkok.

At Siam Square 

Sobrino de Botin Madrid Dec 2019

This suckling pig is excellent ; from the World's Oldest Restaurant according to Guiness Book of Records

This is a throwback memory of our annual holiday to Europe, most times in December for 2 weeks to 16 days. In December 2019, just before the COVID - 19 hit the world, my family and I (well, one son stayed back in Singapore) were very close to the first cluster COVID epicentre in Europe which was Northern Italy - we didnt know it then, but we were approximately 1 month early before COVID hit Europe with a full force.    

This post is a followup to my lovely meal just the last weekend, a belated Father's Day treat from my wife.  I was reminded of this meal in 2019, 2 and a half years ago !  The restaurant is called Sobrino de Botin and the address is as follows :

C.de Cuchilleros, 17

28005 Madrid,

Spain

Tel :+34 913 6642 17

https:www.botin.es

I do not remember much about the meal except that we had a wonderful suckling pig and that we dined at the basement of the Restaurant. We did a 'walk-in' upon opening (12 noon) so we only waited like 15 minutes before we were ushered to our table, which was a nice surprise. 

So many Suckling Pig Dishes all in preparation for the diners 

We had, amongst others, the salad, clams, suckling pig, and some paella (if I recall correctly)

I wont bore my readers with the details but the suckling pig was really outstanding. That and the fact that it is the world's oldest restaurant still in existence made this trip all the more worthwhile.

Obligatory selfie outside the restaurant 

 with my son Andrew, nice smiles all around 

Adam Road Nasi Lemak June 2023 Review ; Over rated, too sweet chilli sauce.

 

30th June 2023 My Order 

Sutra Set 

I decided to eat one of Singapore's national dishes, apart from the Chicken Rice, Prawn Laksa, Hokkien Mee, and Roti Prata. Nasi Lemak is famous the world over for its succulent and savoury rice infused in coconut and all the add ons.

So off I went, on a rainy Friday morning to Adam Road Hawker Centre. There were 6 people in front of me, as I queued at the No. 1 Adam Road Nasi Lemak. Their competitor, Selera Nasi Lemak was closed today.

My order was the Sutra Set, this costs $6 and comprised the following :

a) Lemak Rice

b) Chilli Sauce (a big dose)

c) Otak (Mackerel Spicy Fish Cake)

d) Peanuts and Fried Anchovies

e) Deep Fried Chicken

f) Omelette slice

g) Cucumber Slice.

The order was smooth and prompt and I quickly dove into the savoury fragrant rice. My verdict ?

Disappointing on several fronts.

 a) Lemak Rice - Ok. Pass

b) Chilli Sauce - too sweet and very spicy. I did not like it at all. Perhaps a Sambal one would have been a better combination with the rice. This is a big fail. 

c) Otak - not very fresh and hardly any meat. I have tried many far more succulent (banana smell from the wrap and the fish taste is there).Borderline  

d) Peanuts and Anchovies - OK, Acceptable.

e) Chicken - too dry and not juicy. Fail

f) Omelette slice - no impression

g) Cucumber slice - no impression.

The price of $6 while reasonable, did not live up to its billing as 'good'. It is barely acceptable.

Overall, it didn't live up to my expectation to what a good nasi lemak should be. There are 2 which I highly recommend which are better in my opinion.

a) Lee Wee and Brothers (Old Airport Road, and outlet at JEM Basement 1)

b) Drips (Tiong Poh Road in Tiong Bahru) 

which are much better in the meat, and omelette departments. Their rice is also very fragrant.

House Living ; Thursday 29th June 2023 Public Holiday

a Very Small but Tidy Garden

I've lived 70% of my life (baby,toddler, teen and adult) in landed property. I am indeed fortunate (especially in Singapore) to own a small piece of land with a house built on it, in the central part of Singapore. In many other countries in other parts of Asia, Europe and the world, people in cities normally live in apartment blocks (called condominiums) and / or public housing owing to the scarcity of land and the land prices. My parents used to own a large plot of land, and before their deaths, they subdivided the big plot into 2 and sold the 2 plots of land to my brother and I.

How is living on land compared to living in apartments ? Well I have lived a total of  46 years in landed property and additionally I have lived 14 years in 2 condominiums.

Here are the Pros of Living in Landed Homes and the Cons too. There is no one Perfect Solution except one which may be best suited depending on the age, gender and health of the person at each stage in Life.

Pros (Landed House)

1. The plot however small or large is yours to upkeep. You can make it beautiful or leave it to deteriorate, no one has any right to comment. Not like in a communal environment where your neighbours will complain if you grow your potted plants and leave your slippers and shoes (or worse) all over the place.

2. You have a lot of space for each person (generally speaking). So there is more privacy as space (we have almost 3500 ft2 of gross floor area over 4 floors) and this gives each person some 'living room'.This is in my own opinion, the best PLUS of living in a landed place, the ability to Live Large. "Lebensraum" is the best thing about living in landed property. 

3, Neighbours are not so close together (noise, smoke and general discomfiture amongst neightbours are there, they are rare, speaking from my own personal experience), so you DO get privacy - which is priceless in many of today's cramped up societies.

4. Parking (within your house boundary) is free and safe, so no worries about scratches or vandals scratching or doing other stuff to your precious car. 

 Street View 29th June 2023 4.05 pm

Cons (Landed House)

1. You have to handle all the problems and you cannot assign it to a Managing Agent or Common Property Managing Committee (like in Condos and HDB) to solve. Garbage disposal, Roof and Basement leaks (there are many and they are a pain - trust me) are plentiful. Light changes, inside the house and outside your house driveway, driveway tiles breaking,trees need pruning, wooden trellis worn out, basement leaks, garden and pool lights busted - the list is endless. Be prepared to have REGULAR maintenance and have a list of dependable handymen around else you have to live with the problems. I have tried to change the light bulbs rather unsuccessfully and do some pruning of the weeds, and thats about it as far as my poor handyman skills go.

Always set aside at least $1000 every month for maintenance if your house is more than 10 years old.

2. You will not be as close to your neighbours and will lack the 'gotong royong' or community spirit like in some HDB and condominium blocks.Our neighbours on both sides are foreigners, as the owners have rented out their houses and we hardly speak a couple of words except Hello and GoodBye every other week. This revolving door of tenants staying only 2 years makes the community spirit or bonds amongst the neighbourhood weak. I do personally know 3 to 4 families in our entire neighbourhood of perhaps 50 but that is a very small percentage in relation to the total. We have lived in this neighbourhood a total of 30 years over 2 distinct spells of time.

Perhaps it is my poor ability to interact frequently or its just that private landed owners normally keep to themselves and value privacy high amongst their value systems.

3. Walking up 3 flights of steps to reach your room - as I get older and weaker, this thought of wanting to stay in a small apartment seems more and more appealing. So, having more floors means more work and for older (young old) couples it will be a quandary and many decide to 'downgrade' by either selling, or renting the owned property and moving to a condominium or HDB apartment which is nearer to key amenities like wet market, supermarket, and clinics.

The house appears larger and more difficult to maintain as we grow older - that is a fact and a real disadvantage. My immediate neighbour installed a lift in his 3 story house, to prepare for the day, he is on a wheelchair. That is indeed forward looking.

My Little Piece of Heaven

What do I particularly like about my house ?

a) The little wooden trellis walkway with the Bamboo trees, the water feature, the couple of garden chairs and the wind occasionally billowing in the evening. I am like in heaven, in my little space and having a wine or a Tiger beer with some small snacks. Taking in the night sky with the vast starry expanse, away from the hustle and bustle of the city, I can pause and reflect on my day or my week just passed.

It is an intensely private and happy time for me, each and every time I sit there. I am happy in my own thoughts about what had transpired that day, as I reflect on things or incident that I could have been done better and just thinking about Life in general. 

My Own Quiet Space

b) Occasionally (like today) I trim the bamboo shoots which have gone awry and sweep the leaves from the frangipani tree. Listen to the bubbling of the water from the water feature behind me, I am at peace.

To me, that is the perfect antidote for a busy day, to sit in quiet solitude, just for a  

                                                                 while

                                                           Carpe Diem  

 

Fabulous Spanish Food at Dempsey Hill Tinto Main Courses 2nd of 2 Posts

 

Grilled Vegetables with Pesto Sauce 

The second of 2 posts of a truly unforgettable meal on 24th June 2023. Tinto is the name of this restaurant located in Dempsey Hill Block 10. The above dish is grilled vegetable with some pesto sauce. Yummy. The family and I lapped up every single morsel of it. It was that delicious.

Chicken and Pork Paella - Superb to Par Excellence

The paella is also superb, I am running out of superlatives and again the rice was fragrant, with my younger son Andrew scraping the edge of the pan to get every last morsel of this dish.

Roast Suckling Pig Leg Portion 

The last time we ate a Spanish suckling pig was at the Sorbino de Botin in Madrid in December 2019. This one at Tinto comes very close to the refinement and succulence of that unforgettable meal. The skin was crispy. Fortunately we ordered the leg or trotters portion, so there was much less fat.

Fruit Bowl with Brandy

The fruit bowl had a base covered in brandy and everything single piece of the bowl was infused with alcohol. One could easily fall in love with this dessert again and again each time he or she eats it.

 Churros 

I am willing to wager a meal that this restaurant will get at least 1 Michelin star(s) the next time the Michelin people are in town. So watch out for Tinto !

Tinto Spanish Restaurant

Block 10 Dempsey Road,

#01-21

Singapore 247700

Tel : 9729 5002

To book :

https://tinto.sg

Fabulous Spanish Food at Dempsey Hill - June 24th 2023 Post 1 of 2

Pulpo a La Brasa with Mojo Rojo

Grilled Octopus, Mojo Rojo Canario and Catalan Lentil Stew 9 / 10

At the quiet corner Block 10 of Dempsey Hill, Tinto Restaurant offers the finest in Catalonian cuisine. My family hosted this for the belated Father's Day celebrations which traditionally occurs every 2nd Sunday in June. All the dishes we tried were standout fantastic and really tasty. We (my wife, son and I) have been to Barcelona, Sevilla, Madrid and the Basque country in recent years (pre COVID) so we have tried their FINEST cuisines and I am most happy to report this ranks RIGHT AT THE TOP.  

First, off the cold soup (no pictures I am afraid). Gazpacho ($12) is made of cold tomato, Japanese cucumber, cherry tomatoes and raspberry tomatoes, it was so refreshing and a palette cleanser. 

We had 4 tapas and 3 main courses, with the obligatory paella. Pronounced 

"Pai Ei Ya". Here are the 4 tapas. Reviews.

Pulpo a La Brasa (above picture) 

The texture of the grilled octopus is perfect. The flavour is smooth with the right amount of Mojo Rojo Canario and Catalan Stew. The grilled bits are the octopus which have been sou vided for up to 4 hours to achieve this level of perfection. 9/10. 

Spanish Broken Omelette with Caramalised Onion and Garlic Oil 

10 / 10 

I am a 3 dish cook, mainly scrambled eggs, bruschette, some grilled steak and the ever pleasing omelette. The Spanish omelette above is par excellente, very fine texture and with the garlic chips, and herbs thrown in, is a simple yet exquisite tasting dish. 10 out of 10.  

 Gambas Al Ajillio 

10 / 10 

The prawns are lightly cooked pan fried, with some Roasted Garlic Oil, Dried Chilli and Garlic Chips.Really really tasty. There is light tomato puree beneath the prawns, and it tastes creamy and buttery. Heavenly to the taste buds. 10 / 10  

SangRia Every Man's favorite. 

8 / 10 

Frankly, the Sangria is not the best I have tasted, there are far better ones in Barcelona but the taste of the Vermouth is enough to bring memories of our last visit to Barcelona in 2016. 

The Best Tapas of all

Tosta Ramona with Anchovies and Burata Cheese 

11 / 10 

The best Tapas in my opinion is the Toasta Ramona with Anchovies and Burata Cheese. This is a unique cant beat the smoky flavor of the anchovies and the Burata cheese is simply out of this world creamy and with the slight tangy sourish flavour like yoghurt.  

 

Parc Guell 2016 

Bodega la Puntual 

Barcelona

The last time we were in Barcelona, I had numerous good experiences and one bad one. My handphone was stolen right under my nose. It was due to the fact that we were tourists, and tired from the long haul flights, that these petty thieves got away with my then brand new Samsung Note10.

That bad experience notwithstanding, my overall 5 days 4 nights stay was really outstanding with fantastic tapas (the one really good is called Bodega La Puntual near Bjorn suburb), the following really memorable sites :

a) La Familia Sagrada Church

b) Parc Guell

c) Montjuic

d) Waterfront

e) La Rambla

f)  Joao Miro Museum

One or a couple could spend a week just chilling and enjoying the vibes of this fantastic Catalonian city - just watch out for the omnipresent pickpockets !

Carpe Diem